So there I was...sitting at my mild-mannered customer service desk job, when a man codenamed "Martez" sends me an IM.
"Are we on a secure channel?" he asked.
"Secure?! This is AIM, man! I think the only things that are less secure are Outlook and Internet Explorer,” I replied.
After pausing for a few seconds to make intimidating looks at his screen, and possibly light a cigarette in his theoretically dimly lit room, he continued. "We're getting a copy of Spy Fiction in from our operatives at Sammy. We need a reviewer. Someone who can get into the game, get the information we need, then get back out and debrief us. 66 said you were the man for the job.”
I scrolled back up through the message box to raid everything he said. Some of it got cut off. "Count me in", I fired back. "Today is a good day to spy."
*Cue Spy soundtrack, and cape flinging*
All kidding aside, though, I basically pounced on this game once I got it. The last year or so, my gaming group has been running the Spycraft pen & paper RPG and recently just started getting into the Spycraft CCG. (BTW, Banshee Net is the coolest faction out there.) So, basically, I was everything Sammy could hope for, as far as being receptive to their game, short of someone they'd bribed. How'd that play out? I'll tell you...once I start this obsessively intricate method of doing away with you!
The Intel Report
The game starts out with some guy walking into an airport, looking at a camera, and then dropping a briefcase in plain sight. Then a little ball rolls out, and it's implied that lots of people have ceased to be. Afterwards, an evil dictator from a group called Enigma films a video threatening everyone unless they confess their sins. To whom, we don't know. But it would seem to be a demand that's pretty easy to meet.
However, before the entire country breaks down and admits their guilt, the US is already scrambling. Three of their top agents, Billy Bishop, Sheila Crawford, and their sidekick, Young David Bowie...I mean Nicklaus, are on their way to fight for the skeletons in the closet of every man, woman, and kid in America. Pray they succeed, I mean, because your mom would KILL you if she knew what you were up downloading last night.
Proceeding with the Mission
At the beginning of the game you get to choose between either playing as Billy "I'm Hyde from L'arc en Ciel" Bishop, or Sheila "Offspring of Chucky and Devon Aoki" Crawford. Gameplay differs slightly between the two, with Sheila being able to transform into any character in the game, but Billy lacks the ability to cross dress.
One of the neat things about the game is you can select difficulty levels right away. You can set the difficulty for the action side of the game, allowing you to take more hits, and adjust the level of intelligence of the enemy AI. You can also set the difficulty for the adventure side of the game, telling the game to give you hints on the level of say, Metal Gear Solid, or drawing things out like, "You need to hit Brad in the back of the head with a shot put, and then use the powdered sugar on his desk to make it look like he's snorting cocaine at work." This is good for letting people new to the stealth genre get their feet wet, or for those who just like to shoot but can't be bothered with those wacky puzzle-solving aspects.
Movement is simple, and is done with the left analog stick. The Triangle button will let you scroll through your weapons, secondary items, etc. The right analog stick will give you freedom to move the camera. This can be set to inverted vertical (the proper way), inverted horizontal, and regular (the wrong way). L1 performs most of your actions like activating your optic camo, climbing in cramped spaces to choose a disguise, and dragging unconscious people. Square shoots, and if you're holding your weapon, the X button will make you look like a tool. I have never in my entire life seen such a poorly approximated jumping animation. Aside from the self-humiliation, X will also allow you to use your 3D camera, essential for taking pictures of people you want to double as.
Disguising is probably the coolest part of the game. You take a picture of someone from way far away, and then snap a photo of their face. Then you dive into a cramped space, and select which body you want to come out with. It's a pretty neat gimmick, one that Sammy could use in further games to good effect, I'd imagine.
Your HUD's filled with all kinds of other information like the "Stealth" gauge from Metal Gear Solid, your health, how many times your disguise can be checked before it's seen through, and what weapons are currently armed. Basically, if you're played MGS or Splinter Cell, you're going to be able to get the hang of this pretty quickly.
I've Got a Visual
The game doesn't look too shabby. The optic camo is a pretty nice little gimmick, as is the transformation into the other models. The CG is decent, but there are a lot of pointless little clips that aren't worth watching. It's also cool how the main characters have facial expressions upon death, instead of just slumping over and looking exactly the same.
Aside from that, they should have made Sheila look a bit less rounded, because she looks really odd.
Maintain Radio Silence
Oh how I wish they would have followed that order. Instead, they go rogue, and lay out some of the most pitiful voice acting sequences I've ever heard. There's a scene in the Training/Prologue missions where Billy "yells" out in agony over something that just happens and it's sounds like an uncomfortable yawn. Thankfully, the main characters shut up for most of the game, as they happen to be the source of most of the truly awful bits. Dietrich Troy and his German accent aren't bad, at least not as bad as the script. Aside from that, the effects and the music aren't that bad. Guns and grenades and such sound all right, and the music isn't a drawback, either.
Gripes
I'm fine with spy movie spoofs. I'm also fine with the realistic Cloak & Dagger ambiance. I'm not fine with a scenario that can't figure out what it wants to be. On one hand you have agents running around with gear and guns, and trying to stop bioweapons. On the other, you have corporation names like, "NanotechDyne", and two of the first three characters you're introduced to look like bad rip-offs of pop singers from other countries. If you want to be realistic, be realistic; if you're going to be tongue in cheek, so be it. Don't strive for realism and then not care.
The plot also needs some work. I'm not supposed to be laughing as Mr. Evil Incarnate delivers his speeches and performs heinous acts against my friends. Granted, a lot of this stems from the bad voice acting and the subtitles, ("You, BASTARD!" carries an entirely different meaning than, "You bastard!" does) but the writers aren't completely exonerated either.
The auto-lock and targeting system needs to have some of the kinks worked out. Granted, you are given a generous amount of health, so it's not a huge problem, but it would allow the level designers to make more challenging and enjoyable levels, rather than just making sure you can take a hail and a half of bullets.
Why do I have to knock people out a random number of times to search their unconscious bodies? Is he really tucking that grenade away so securely I have to put him in a choke hold 4 times before it shakes loose, and on top of that it's impossible to find when he's not even resisting? For that matter, why do the dead bodies disappear and the unconscious ones remain? Isn't a guy bleeding from his eye slightly more obvious/important to notice than someone who is just apparently asleep at his job?
Mission Debrief
Clocking in at about 8-10 hours, Spy Fiction isn't a horrible game, merely a slightly below average one. If you are just chomping at the bit and must play something to get your Metal Gear Solid 3 fix before it's here, then by all means, give Spy Fiction a whirl.
However, for everyone else, this is a rental at best. The disguise and level difficulty settings look to me like Access Games had the foundation for a very interesting game here, it just never panned out, or they ran out of development time. They need to get a sequel or an alternate title out of this game, and try and rework the story, levels, and targeting. Some of the other little touches as far as items go, like the Flashbang Pen, the Boomerang Card and such are really cool add-ons; now go ahead and add some more, since people like spies because of all the wonderful toys. You do those things, and Spy Fiction might someday be a title that divides gamers like the debate between NBA Live and ESPN Basketball. As it is currently, Spy Fiction is just going to be slumming with Cy Girls, Lifeline and the rest of the gimmicky MGS look-alike also-rans.
Sorry, Sammy, this isn't worth $40...Mission Failed, Regroup.
