Virtua Fighter and Tekken were much like Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter. They were both fighting games, and generally fans of one didn't like the other. They fought it out in a bitter slugfest for survival, and by the time Tekken 3 came out, Virtua Fighter was looking like it had just about taken all the punishment it could stand. By the time Virtua Fighter 4 rolled around, even the substandard Tekken 4 was able to knock it on its ass for the final time.
So, time passed and Sega started repurposing all its venerable franchises. Sonic got his own crazy game, they announced Shenmue as an MMO, and then came Virtua Quest. What's next? The All-American 18-Wheeler Tactics game? (You heard it here first!)
I hadn't fired up the ol' Cube in a while, so I decided to give this game a shot...because my roommate had borrowed my PS2.
Story
You're Sei, a generic anime kid who takes his first trip into Nexus, a virtual world set up so that people around the overcrowded Earth can jump in and take their mind off of mundane things.
You jack in with the help of a hyperactive friend, Hayami who tries to show you the ropes of Nexus. After a first “botched” attempt at jacking in, Sei's dad sends Sei a Hunter's Glove that comes complete with a “Mag” type add-on. Sei dives back into Nexus after Hayami tells him that the two of them need cash so he can fix their busted airbike so they can be in a big race. So our protagonist goes off in search of "data chips", presumably so they can be sold for cash.
What he finds is a strange girl, and some even stranger villains that are roaming around Nexus and locking down systems, then hijacking users. Eventually Sei learns that the group is called Judgement Six, and they're after Virtua Souls...data recorded during the Virtua Fighter tournaments that contain the ability to grant certain people the techniques and abilities of the fighters in the tournament. Since Sei has basically has no choice, he reluctantly shoulders the hero's burden and starts trying to figure out what's going on.
Gameplay
You can run, jump, hang, run along walls, et cetera. You also have a number of customizable attacks, similar to the combat system of Shenmue where you assign one of a number of moves to a button press. You'll have to go through all of this in the mandatory tutorial, so I'm not going to spend too much time discussing it. For the most part, Sei just runs along from server to server, beats stuff up, occasionally encounters a boss or friendly NPC, and then confusedly does his thing.
Inside the servers, you'll often find Virtua Souls as part of your quest. Upon first discovering them, you'll get an introduction to a character from the Virtua Fighter games, and then you'll beat them up. After that, they'll teach you one of their moves, which you can either replace an existing move with or just keep stashed away to gain Virtua Interest or something.
As you gain data chips, you can exchange them for upgrade modules which you attach to Sei's data core by playing 3D-Tetris to get them to pile in correctly. You'll also get food for your “Mag” thing. Feeding it increases/decreases one of its 3 attributes, and certain stat balances with change the form and behavior of the “Mag”.
Now, while the mechanics of the game look like everything is set for a grand time to be had by all, that's just not the case. The story just gets weirder and weirder, while the redundant combat and the jumping puzzles just bog the game down.
Graphics
Nothing is too bad. The textures do look a bit dated...like they just recycled a bunch of the worlds from Phantasy Star Online, and used them for the various data servers that comprise Nexus. Hayami looks like a retard, and Sei's mysterious female friend doesn't look right at all.
Audio
Some of the voice-overs are really bad. Once again, Sei's female friend leads the way in this category. Sei and Hayami don't fare too well, either. The effects are all right, and so is the music, but I have to pass out low marks for the audio just based on how often I was groaning at the voices.
Gripes
The dialogue in the game is just fantastically weird. For example, every time you unlock one of the Virtua Souls, they'll have a little conversation with you, in a very “Knowing is Half the Battle” kind of way.
The Virtua Fighters seem to be obsessed with two things: telling you the story of why they entered the Virtua Fighter Tournament, and making sure that you have determination. It doesn't matter how far removed these two things are removed from Sei's initial response to their "greeting", they will always end up in the conversation, often with no semblance of a segue at all. Take this summary of your first encounter with Jacky Bryant for example:
Jacky: Are you interested in testing your limits?
Sei: Yeah, I'm interested in seeing what I'm capable of.
Jacky: I trained my sister in the arts of Jeet Kung Do, but she was kidnapped and brainwashed by an evil organization, so I had to enter a fighting tournament to infiltrate it. Now, let us see if you have true determination!
First off, Jacky's been watching “Enter the Dragon” one too many times. Second, did nobody over at Sega didn't realize that these bits of dialogue have nothing to do with one another? The majority of the dialogue that happens in game seems to have absolutely NOTHING to do with what's going on during the cutscene. A character will have a response like, “That's too bad.” and his persona will be jumping all over the place with his eyes all bugged out.
This is quite frankly...pathetic.
While we're on the subject of pathetic...just who thought it was a good idea to stick the grapple whip on the C-Stick, and the camera control onto a shoulder button? The whip only goes one direction, straight forward. The camera, however, needs to move 360 degrees to be effective...so why is the stick used by the function that only needs an on/off state, and why is the on/off state shoulder button used for the function that needs a range of movement? It makes NO SENSE, and it's a HUGE annoyance.
Then there's the fighting. Every enemy, every boss, every Virtua Fighter in the game falls for the same aerial 3-hit combo, til' death do they remain stupid. Combine that with the very first super move you learn after taking out one of the VF characters, and every fight is over very, very quickly.
Just how bad is the action in this game? Well, take this bit of information into consideration; this is the first fighting game I've ever seen where you can take a hit, and your Combo meter still keeps counting. You know, just give 'em the ol' “1-2-get kicked in the groin-3”! In my book, that's called giving up on a game.
Overall
Let's see...Tekken 5...or Virtua Quest? I think it's fairly obvious to any outside observers that Virtua Fighter is down for good.
Sadly, it's gotten to the point where you can't even feel sorry for Sega anymore. They've just put out so many bad games, and made so many bad decisions recently, that you realize that if you support them they're just going to parlay that support into something utterly stupid...like this. Look Sega, you guys need help. The public is dying to support you, but not if you keep making games like Virtua Quest, and Sonic Cuts the Ribbon at The Mall. There's a reason all the guys with creative vision have either left your company, or are busy not making Shenmue 3. Brainstorm for something creative, original, and good or the Virtua Fighter folks are going to be hanging out with Johnny Turbo
